Dead Witness Humor

Posted on May 10, 2007 by Juan Antunez

The following is from the Wills, Trusts & Estates Prof Blog:

By Texas Senior U.S. District Judge Jerry Buchmeyer, et cetera, 70 Tex. B.J. 193 (2007):

    D. Clinton Brasher of Beaumont, Texas, received these marvelous admissions “from defense counsel regarding an employee of theirs (up until the time of his death)” who was listed as a fact witness:

1. Admit that ______ is dead.

RESPONSE: Admit insofar as this question is regarding information regarding the death of ______’s body, as his spirit surely lives on.

2. Admit that ___________ will be unavailable to testify at trial.

RESPONSE: Admit subject to ___’s coming back to life and subsequently testifying in this matter, or, for that matter, testifying through a duly appointed oracle. … Inasmuch as this request for admission is meant to cover such things other than whether or not ____ will be available to testify live at trial, no pun intended, Plaintiff objects to the request as vague.

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